Getting Older

I've written already about the fact that I am retired from teaching high school. Retirement has many advantages but there are some drawbacks. Some drawbacks are even serious but I present here my favorite observations on aging from a little book called, Age Happens, compiled by Bruce Lansky.

1. Middle age is that time when you always think that in a week or two you will feel as good as ever. -Don Marquis
2. Today isn't the first day of the rest of your life. It's Friday. -Bruce Lansky and K.L. Jones
3. Despite the high cost of living, it's still quite popular. -Laurence J. Peter
4. Middle age is when a woman gets up on a bus to offer her seat to you. Old age is when the woman who gets up to offer her seat is pregnant. -Bruce Lansky
5. If you look like your passport photo, you're probably too sick to travel. -Will Kommen
6. I much prefer being over the hill to being under it. -Bruce Lansky
7. The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not. -Mark Twain
8. After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you probably are dead. -Tommy Mein
9. The first thing I do when I wake up in the morning is breathe on a mirror and hope that it fogs. -Earl Wynn
10. You know you're getting old when you stop buying green bananas. -Lewis Grizzard